Sunday, January 23, 2011

The Next Step In Human Evolution

Darwin's Theory of Evolution is the widely held notion that all life is related and has descended from a common ancestor, and claims that man, monkeys, and apes ALL evolved from a common ape-like ancestor over 20 million years ago, at which time monkeys split off from the evolutionary line. Monkeys are strictly New World primates, found only in Central and South America. Apes are strictly Old World primates, found only in Africa and Asia. Humans and apes had common ancestry until about 5-8 million years ago, which explains why we share so much more of our DNA with apes, particularly chimpanzees, than we do with monkeys.

That being said, I'm beginning to wonder if we are more like monkeys than we realize. Perhaps we, too, had tails at one point, and in the next step of evolution we lose a little more. That would explain the growing number of spineless people that make something like "political correctness" common place in today's society.

Recently, every member of the PC movement has been lining up to take their stab at Ricky Gervais, like a modern day assassination of Julius Caesar, after his comments at the 2011 Golden Globes. The only difference; Today's assassins are too cowardice to brandish a dagger, or look their victim in the eyes.
Granted, I'm not a supporter of violence. I'm not advocating murder. Instead, I will join the game that they chose to play. I'll sit miles away while attacking with a forked tongue.

For those who didn't see the The Golden Globes, I'll recap what caused all the fuss:

Made fun of Charlie Sheen for being a train wreck - It should be noted that everything Ricky said about Charlie was also reported on NBC news. The same network that televised the Golden Globes.

Made fun of the movie The Tourist - Critics said, The scenery and the stars are undeniably beautiful, but they can't make up for The Tourist's slow, muddled plot, or the lack of chemistry between Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie."

Said the Hollywood Foreign Press accepted bribes - In 1981, Pia Zadora won a Golden Globe in the category "Newcomer-of-the-Year" for her performance in Butterfly, over such competition as Elizabeth McGovern (Ragtime) and Kathleen Turner (Body Heat). Accusations were made that the Foreign Press Association members had been bought off. Pia's husband, multimillionaire Meshulam Riklis, flew voting members to his casino, the Riviera Hotel in Las Vegas, which gave the appearance that they voted for Zadora to repay this. Riklis also invited voting members to his house for a lavish lunch and a showing of the film. He also spent a great deal on advertising. The film had not been released in the U.S. at the time of the awards, which should have made Zadora ineligible for an award associated with it.

Said they weren't bribed, just taken to see Cher in concert - The nominations for the 2011 Globes drew initial skepticism, as the Foreign Press Association nominated Burlesque in its Best Musical/Comedy category, despite the critical failure of the film. The skepticism turned to outrage when news surfaced that Sony, the distributor, had treated Globes voters to an all-expenses-paid trip to Las Vegas, culminating in a concert by Cher, the film's star.

Made fun of the age of the women in Sex In The City - The average age of the girls from Sex In The City is 48 years old. I don't mean to be the bearer of bad news, but all of them are playing the back nine of their lives.

Said some famous Scientologists are gay actors pretending to be straight...probably - During his marriage to Nicole Kidman, the couple endured public speculation about their sex life and rumors that Tom Cruise was gay. In 2006, Jeff Kathrein and Travolta were photographed kissing by paparazzi. Kathrein is one of the Travolta family's two nannies. On his website, he describes himself as a photographer. His qualifications for childcare are unclear, other than being a Scientologist like John Travolta and Kelly Preston. Kathrein's wife, Ana, is also a Scientologist. (Some Scientology critics believe the church forces gays and lesbians to stay in the closet and pursue heterosexual relationships.)

Made fun of Hue Hefner for getting engaged to a girl 60 years younger than him - It happened. Period.

Made a fat joke about the guy from Lost - Several references were made to the weight of the character on the show. When the series ended, many said that a lot of questions about the plot were left unanswered, so a joke about the possibility of him eating everyone seems pretty harmless.

Producers Guild Awards host Judd Apatow (aka Brutus) built his opening monologue around an attack on the way Ricky Gervais handled his Golden Globe Awards hosting chores a week earlier in the same room at the Beverly Hilton Hotel.

"What did you think of Ricky Gervais?" he asked the crowd. "I didn’t like him. I thought he was mean."

Apatow, whose movies include The 40-Year-Old Virgin and Knocked Up, knocked Gervais for his controversial jokes. I can only assume he was upset by it because for once, he's not collecting a paycheck from the work that somebody else did that everyone is now talking about.

"He had that joke about the guy on Lost," said Apatow. "He said he ate everybody else. Let’s be honest-- Ricky Gervais just lost weight. Even now he’s four pounds away from not being allowed to do a joke like that. Did he lose weight just to make fat jokes? You think that’s how mean he is?"

I find it rather amusing that he showed his displeasure for Gervais making fat jokes by making fat jokes.

"(Gervais) says the characters were two-dimensional," said Apatow. "Then he says he hasn’t seen The Tourist. So as a comedian, that’s not fair, is it? To make jokes about a movie you haven’t seen.

"I can’t do a joke about (Gervais’s movie) The Invention of Lying because I haven’t seen it. You haven’t seen it. None of us have seen it. So the joke would not work."

This was almost word for word what Gervais said about The Tourist. That makes Apatow, not only a hypocrite, but a joke thief as well.

In philosophy, one looks at a statement and tries to determine precisely what that statement means. Political correctness takes a statement and then looks for not-so-obvious motivations and emotional implications. Nothing is taken at face value. Political correctness, in every way shape and form, seeks to suppress the expression of ideas. The essence of democracy is the choice of ideas and opinions, and the freedom to express these ideas. Today, people live under a blanket of fear. Terrified that they will slip up and say something that the mindless masses don't agree with, and be doomed for the remainder of their lives.

Man up, you sniveling cowards. If you don't have an opinion of your own, you're a dullard who doesn't deserve a voice in the first place. The beauty of an opinion is that it isn't fact. Everyone doesn't have to agree. If you're too afraid to go with your gut, step aside. You're not leader material.

To shun a person for saying what they think is madness, and it stifles creative thought. Without open, honest dialog, we might as well go back to living in caves and throwing shit at each other.


  1. The PC crowd makes me laugh. They live their lives on the mountain top (hidden from sight in a secluded crag mind you.)

    I especially love awards shows...when Hollywood comes out to honor itself. Ugh!

    I liken these folks to the convention attendees at a major church conference which takes place each year in Nashville.

    My buddy manages the convention center bar, which is DEAD during this gathering. The liquor store around the corner, however, enjoys brisk business.

    As they say...Out of sight (praising the Lord, over a bottle of whiskey and 3 prostitutes in the hotel room) means out of mind.

  2. I was seriously offended by how offended Hollywood was with Gervais. Can I get on tv and whine about it like they did? Nope, and neither can you, but thank you for taking the time to point out the ridiculousness of the arguments against Gervais. His jokes were sometimes the kind that made you groan but he never ceased being funny. I think his quick wit (both at the GG's as well as his many other spot-on shows such as THE OFFICE and EXTRAS) is oft impersonated and oft the reason for jealousy which manifests itself in hatred.

    Hollywood seriously needs to stop sniveling and think about how EASY it is to see through their lies. Gervais was just pointing out things we already knew and thought in a hilarious way.